“Family isn’t defined only by last names or by blood; it’s defined by commitment and love” – Dave Willis

 

Arguments or any kinds of fighting are an integral part of married life. Many things trigger this. From parenting styles to task division at home, partners are likely to argue about all things big and small.

But these fights can add fuel to the fire without warning when you as a parent let your child witness it. This brings a negative impact on children’s psychology.

How can fights between parents affect the child’s development? Here are four examples of negative impacts that arise.

1) Bad Problem Solver

The impact of fights between parents in front of children can be disastrous. When children witness their parents’, frequent fights might result in bad problem-solving within them. Children will start to believe that fighting is the way to solve problems.

2) Emotional Disturbance

Any kind of fighting between parents that children see can interfere with their emotional development. Witnessing it regularly leads to early anxiety and mental health problems. They will get scared easily and tend to not believe in themselves.

3) Having Difficulties in Relationship

Children imitate what they see their parents. When parents constantly fight, children will learn the same thing.

As a result, your child’s relationship with their closest people, including their spouse can be disrupted in the future. Even worse, extreme things might happen. It can make your child feel that they do not have to start a relationship because they are afraid of being hurt.

4) Health Problems

Seeing parents fighting regularly makes children feel anxious and depressed easily. As a result, children begin to seek escape in various forms such as in food. They may stop eating or overeating.

When bad habits start to form due to anxiety, they may have health problems. Besides, anxiety also impacts sleep. Fights between parents can cause behavioral problems as well as phobias in children.

These are the reasons why parents are advised to avoid arguments that can be seen directly by children, especially in their childhood. Even if you are forced to argue in front of the children, keep trying to control your emotions so the arguments are more like discussions.

There are several things you can do if you cannot avoid an argument in front of children:

  • Doing arguments which looks like a discussion where you and your partner are seen discussing each other by your child.
  • Stay in control and avoid negative things such as yelling at each other which can make children feel anxiety and restlessness.
  • Not physically violent when fighting or hurting one another with words. If this happens in front child, you must immediately apologize to your partner as well as your child. Teach children that losing emotional control is not the right solution to solve problems.
  • Always try to solve problems quickly and find solutions in front of children. Doing this will give a child a real example of how you treat one another.
  • After arguing with your spouse, show children that you and your partner still love and respect each other. Learn from the problem and quickly move on from problems that have already been resolved.

May 9, 2021

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