As a parent, you do not want to make mistakes in caring for and educating your children. However, most parents are too often rely on their ‘nurturing instincts and do not try to get help with common parenting problems.

As a result, the result of this parental instinct is less helpful in knowing what to do in every situation we face as parents. Therefore, you must learn to overcome the six common mistakes that often occur in parenting below. This will help you become a more effective parent and educate your children better.

  1. Not Being an Example for Children

The first and foremost duty of parents is to be good role models for children. However, many parents tolerate their bad behavior and indirectly set this bad example for their children. Parents who explode during a conflict between partners, often blame others or often lie unconsciously to train their children to do the same.

Blaming your children for the bad behavior and habits you teach them is like blaming the mirror for your own reflection. Therefore, be a good example for your child as you want to be in your children. Before you blame children for their behavior, make sure your behavior as a parent is a true example for them.

  1. Not Allowing children to Explore Their Surroundings

From birth, our children are constantly learning. Babies begin to learn to recognize your face, pick up on expressions, and slowly grow to understand other things. Even as your little one grows up to be a teenager, playing is their favorite way of learning and in this way, they frequently end up bruised or injured.

Do not make this an excuse to stop them from exploring their surroundings. If parents continue to look after and correct their children, they will grow up to be a person who does not want to try new things or learn from their mistakes.

  1. Comparing Children with Other Children

This is something that has a very bad impact on children. It is common that when a child starts school, their grades are compared to their classmates. It is important to note that constantly telling them that other people are better will not change them to be better.

On the contrary, it will affect their self-confidence. The right thing to do as parents is to support them in all their efforts and help them figure out the reasons for their failures at certain times or if something else is bothering them. It will be much more effective than just comparing and scolding your children.

  1. Perfectionist Parents

Parents who are perfectionists (want perfection) can be seen on the positive side if they are able to manage their perfectionism. However, this is often a problem in raising children. You become the parent who sees everything your child does as not good enough or not enough.

Parents who are stuck in a perfectionist parenting style tend to think that their child has great talents, they just need to work harder for them. So, why isn’t it effective? Because perfectionist parents teach the child that failure will always happen to children.

If a child can never live up to their parents’ high standards, why should they try? When the child is successful, perfectionist parents are not always satisfied. They will always raise the standard, insisting that their child can do better next time.

Perfectionist parents often feel that they know their child so well, they know what they are thinking. When you do this, you teach your children to never show their emotions, keep their own achievements, and avoid interacting with you. Because they know they will never be good enough. You are not teaching your child to reach their potential. You teach them to fear every mistake.

Therefore, you need to differentiate between your expectations and the child’s actual interests. Pressure and scolding will not make your child develop. On the other hand, encouraging children to reach their goals and explore their natural talents will lead to much better and grow.

  1. Give Everything for Children

Parents with this type of hope to have a good relationship with their children by giving them whatever they want. The author also often sees this happening in the family. Parents spoil their children materially to stop the child’s behavior problems or prevent future problems.

When this is happening in your family, you create a feeling of wrongful entitlement to children. They learned to manipulate you to give them what they want. Because it is easy to get material goods, children do not learn the reality of having to work to get rewards or compensation.

This has a negative impact on their future to become independent people. It can expose them to future problems in the adult workforce as well as setting and achieving their personal goals.

Therefore, parents must learn to say no in the right situations for children. You also need to tolerate their child’s reactions when they do not get what they want. If you want to use material things as gifts for children, make sure they are getting that because of the positive things that happen such as seeing their efforts and achievements, not simply when they want to.

  1. Threatening Children’s Bad Behavior

As teachers, the authors see many parents often do this. When you are tired of the bad behavior of the child, the things that happen more often is giving threat to children with something that scares them.

Threatening or yelling at children is a form of child abuse. It can cause emotional harm and may also make them a person with low self-esteem in the future. What parents need to instill for their children is to consistently teach them to follow the rules, but without physical or verbal injury.

May 10, 2021

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